The Fifteen Minute Challenge: A Sonnet

Been a hell of a two weeks.  I need a distraction.  This has been provided by a friend who issues me The Fifteen Minute Challenge: I have been asked to write a sonnet in fifteen minutes in which I contradict myself six times in fourteen lines of rhymed iambic pentameter.  Mock Renaissance, I think.  Bear in mind: I'm being timed.

All rivers flow into the sea, all winds 

blow north to south upon their circuit-routes;

No sailor curses those who on his voyage sends,

No cleric damns the soul who truly doubts.

The desert soaks the river down its throat.

The storm, unruly, casts its compass out;

All swear ungoverned in a sinking boat,

All decry whoso will the godhead flout.

But my love for thee is everlong

And I am thine for ever and a day:

I'll be around, I think's the short and long,

And insofar as Mood bids, I will stay.

I come to find my darling rhymes are napping,

Bent o'er the table, readied for a strapping.